Wednesday, December 03, 2008
OH, its been long since i had blogged. but oh wells, today is a special day thus i will blog today. HAHAHAH. today is prom, i had nvr went to prom and i finally know how does it feels like to go to prom. it feels great to dress up at your best and eat a good dinner with your friends and classmates.
well, i always heard ppl choose the prom KING and QUEEN, i am so disgusted by the people of PJC, they really anyhow pick any tom dick harry to go and be prom KING and QUEEN, both of them are some ugly pieces of shit. isnt prom KING and QUEEN be andsome and pretty??? i really dunno what the hell was going on in the heads of the PJC minds. haha i serously think DAWN could be PROM QUEEN of YJC man. hahaha, if the people choose properly of course. GISELA stands a good chance too. hahah.
the food was medicore. i didnt had enough and i had to order Macs after i reached home, my table got extra ppl and the serving of food is the same. wth man, i didnt eat enough. DAMN IT.
after prom i went to DEEP's post prom clubbing event at the BUTTERFACTORY. this is the 2nd time i went to a club. it wasnt really very fun cos its really not my kind of stuff there, so i sit around and do nothing and i left the place really soon.
though prom was kinda boring and lame due to the poor host and idiotic ppl of PJC, but the first prom experience was rather fun and enjoyable. i kinda liked it.
THE ROCKER SHREDS. has posted on
2:59 AM
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Sunday, November 16, 2008
aftering thinking through really hard today, i think i am not fit to be a christian.
THE ROCKER SHREDS. has posted on
1:47 AM
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Saturday, November 15, 2008
finally, its over, its really really over. i really cannot believe my eyes, 2 years of JC jus pass jus like tat. i am partly nostaglic about it but yet glad it is all over. A LEVELS IS FINALLY OVER!!!!
this year's A levels was really tougher than the usual A Levels we expected. from the tys i had done, this year is the hardest of them all. i m really unlucky to be in this year. STUPID MOE.But, i studied my very best, practice to the best tat i can and i really gave it my all. hopefully, i might do well:) alright, though tis is a short post, but it means billions.
once again, its over.
THE ROCKER SHREDS. has posted on
12:23 AM
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Friday, October 10, 2008
WOW, WOW, WOW. look at how long ago since i had updated my blog. i don wanna do so today, but today marks an impt day thus, i had to commemorate this day. today is the last day of my JC school life. to many ppl, its a day of goodbyes, but to me, i feel rather numb about it. as i look for ppl to take pictures with, or someone that i can spend time with after the schoolhours, i realised i found none. suddenly, loneliness jus overwhelmed me. i tot i was emo, but upon closer examination, i was being factual about my surroundings. i felt so empty man. there were hugs and kisses around, but i jus stood aside and watch the ongoings of the many last goodbyes.
these 2 years had been rather tough for me, i struggled throughout these 2 years. sometimes i ask myself why i put myself through such pain and agony, but i realised for a better life ahead of me, i had to grind my teeth and press on ahead. if there is time travel, i will never choose to come back to either of these 2 years, 2007, 2008. NEVER.
jus to update about my life abit since its ages since i had blogged,
PHYSICALLY, i had shrunk in size. my muscles had 'deflated' and went into flat mode. i m damn sad abt it, i took great pains to train them, but now, i had to retrain them after As. -.- i look less robust and slightly thinner. sometimes i dun even dare to wear some kinda clothes.
MENTALLY, i think i had grown, since i jus drown myself with books and tuitions and consulations. i really need to mug man for this final hours. i think i am able to think faster and better now. but it comes with great price. i sacrificed my enjoyment and freedom. all my life is circulated now are tuitions, i have tuition almost everyday. can u imagine the money spent in it?
EMOTIONALLY, i seriously think i am in depression or something like that. with all the books and burden i have now, alot of things suddenly happened, and non of them are good things. if you know it, you know it, i dun wanna elaborate further. i think i really took a great hit emotionally.
SPIRITUALLY, well, to be really really honest, i am not exactly doing very well in church. i had alot of questions and doubts abt how the church is functioning and its really confusing me. my leaders do not meet me at all( maybe due to my As) and i seriously suspect some of my leaders don like me or have some shit against me. well, if that is so, you are not fit to be my leader, you are jus lyk everyone else, a judgemental FUCKER.
well, thats about my life now, its really in a bad state, pls, don add upon my weight, its really very heavy already.
THE ROCKER SHREDS. has posted on
1:22 AM
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Friday, August 15, 2008
WAH finally i am blogging after a very very long time. i really wanna blog man. it is really either i m too tired or i cant find the time or i am jus pure lazy. haha. finally able to pen down my thoughts properly.
recently, the first question people ask me is,' hey, how have u been? or how is your day?' i dunno why they are asking these, but my answer to those questions are rather generic and simple. 'BAD'. hahahhaha. these few weeks have been really bad weeks for me. it's piles of work after piles of work. OMG. in addition there are still some misc stuff to settle and all. i m really panting and i am running out of breath man. i feel so so burnout and i cant do a single thing abt it. i tried giving myself a break. i went out to jus enjoy a whole day, though i alr finished wad i m suppose to finish, but tat night i came back from the trip, i feel very very very guilty. lyk i alr wasted a day or something. the stress and toil are really getting up to me alr man. i noe i m repeating my stuff over and over again, but tat is really wad i m feeling now.
today i got counselled by DALLAS, SHI JUN and WEI YUAN. it was quite suprising and touching experience for me actually. i can feel the genuinity tat they really wanna help me in my JC life and my studies. i started telling abt my whole JC life and how i have been failing all the waya nd i m so sick of failing tat i m abt to give up to the point tat i m jus gonna give up on my prelims and do my final boost during the As. they decided to counsel me and talk some sense to me. i thought thru abt wad they say and it really makes sense man. i m really touched by them man. other than no one really show such concern for me. i was pretty touched. thanks guys, u guys rocks:)
i still have around 80+ days to A levels. i m really worried for it. teachers are telling us tat we have to get around straight Bs to get into a decent university. and now wad i m getting? Us? and Ss? how m i suppose to suddenly shot up to such grades? the tot of these reeallyt make fear grip my heart. i wan to study, but i feel so so so burnout and i got some many other things to do and settle. i wanan put them aside, but it is impossible to do so. haiz, will someone help me?
THE ROCKER SHREDS. has posted on
10:01 PM
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Friday, July 25, 2008
wow. its been two weeks i have blogged. this 2 weeks has been one of the most hectic week in my life. i had tuition 5 days out of the the 7days. OMG. i always saw the flinch on those JC graduates when i ask them how was J2, i now totally understand how they r feeling. J2 is really very stressful and the syllabus is going at full throttle. sometimes it was so fast that i cant even catch wad the lecturer or tutor is saying. sometimes i was jus lost. i m really worried for As. maybe u may see i m relaxed and all on the outside, but deep down, i always have this sense of stress whenever i think abt the days left to As. Wei Song today told me we jus left with 98 days. that is damn little. im starting to panic man. OMG.
i am like a chiongster for 2 weeks man. i finally decided to come to my orchard hse and just take a short break and start to blog and talk to people. if there aint CIP tml, i wont come to my orchard hse and take a chill pill. even now i m blogging, i have a set of lecture notes waiting for me in the living room for me to read up and go thru thoroughly. haiz... J2 is really damn stress man. i starting to feel the faitgue. i slp almost 1 everyday. i nid to talk to people, do my work. things r really getting on me. i really felt burnt out. i had hit my limit man. in JC, i nid to do alot more than my peers as i don have Amath background and I don have pure science. Thank God i am very smart, i can enter JC and promoted to J2 and complete my JC education in 2 years. my IQ really brought me disaster man. if i have a lower IQ, maybe i would have retained and den things wont be so stressful and so fasted paced for me. things are really going too fast and i dunno if i could catch up anot. i think i m starting to lag behind.....
THE ROCKER SHREDS. has posted on
10:11 PM
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Sunday, July 13, 2008
I had to say, i nvr wished this week would come to an end as soon as possible. this is one of the worst week in my life. everyday a bad thing would happen and i would jus break down. i m so thankful tat this week has finally come to an end, and i think i m going back to the world quite differently.
tues, i got by most of my results, and i got U for everything tat i got for tat day. my Us r not like those high U, but it is really bad Us. i m devastated, i nvr got so bad results b4. this mid yrs was the worst i ever done in my 2 years in JC. i shld be getting Cs and Ds now, but instead, i mdoing my worst. i tot i gave God my june holidays and He will bless me with wisdom to study and show Himself evident in my studies. WOW, how 'evident' he is huh. i totally lost faith in God.
weds came and more results came and it wasnt as good. I got an S for econs. i gave my very best to do econs and i m only getting an S. i m so sad. den at nite, Kenny msged me and tell me he is not going to sch cos he cannot find his sch pe shorts. and the teachers will KB him and all, i was lyk can u stop being so childish. my results r alr occupying most of my mind, can u stop doing silly things to spike me.
thurs was some emo shit day for me. my best and only pal in church decided to leave church. and he is none other than SHERMAN. i was shocked and heartbroken when the news came. i really was at a loss of words. so jessie and i went down to his hse to find him. his heart was totally harden and there is nothing tat i can really do. i left my books just to go down and meet him, he appreciated it, but it made me no mood to go sch the next day so i went to orcahrd hse to stay and didnt go sch on fri.
fri was just a normal day tat i woke up quite late as i didnt go to sch.
sat was ok
sun was not bad, met up with my two good friends and we had dinner together.
thanks for all the people tat stood beside me when i was at the most low point of my life. i daresay i was on the verge of collapsing, but u people held my hands up and kept me from falling, thank you so much.
ppl lyk dawn, jessie jem, sandy. thank you all so much.
i m gonna lead a quite different life from next week onwards, i have a new element in life, i hope it will bring my life to a greater and more happy life. and if u all r gonna think tat i m some unspiritual crap, den too bad for u.
THE ROCKER SHREDS. has posted on
11:26 PM
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